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How I’m Feeling…

I want to start this page with a big thank you to everyone who has left comments on my last few posts. I’m sorry I didn’t reply to them all as I am still now in a great place.

My goal for the past year is be a makeup artist…Its not a big shock to those of you who read this that makeup is a great passion of mine.  I eventually want to go back to work but it seems more and more unlikely at the moment.

Where I live, you have to fit in.  Its been this way from starting school.  Even now, picking my daughter up from school is a hard task for me due to the group of Mums who are there.  I am seen as an outsider.  Not that I want to be friends with people who are judgmental.

You can’t seem to have a problem, you’ll be an attention seeker.  You can’t let your kids go in without the latest gear, they’ll get made fun off.  You can’t say the wrong thing or you’ll always be known as a weirdo.  I could never understand stasis quo.  I’m the black sheep in most places.  Due to all this if I ever got the nerve to try being a makeup artist, I’d most likely never get a client.  I’ve tried doing makeup on a few people and I’ve tried to get the word out.  It’s always been a fail though.

I’d love to make a YouTube channel, that’ll never happen though. My blog is kept a secret as I know my family would tell me to take it down if they found it.  I would be mocked forever if someone found a YouTube channel.  I know mentally I couldn’t handle it either.

I do love my blog though, It makes me feel like more than just a loser without a job.  It’s also really the only place where I can say what I want without fear.

I’m hoping to get back to the makeup reviews soon. Thank you for everyone for sticking around in my wee corner of the internet.

 

 

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3 thoughts on “How I’m Feeling…”

  1. Really hope you feel more positive soon. There is nothing wrong with not fitting in. Yes, it hurts, I know. But I have more respect for you than I would for anyone that conforms. My family, even my wife, rarely read my blog so it is something I treasure as being a private area of my heart where I can interact with like minded people who are quirky, creative and interesting, like you. And I feel free on here, which is most important. So I do get where you are coming from but I appreciate it is hard if you are trying to start a career in a very sociable field and feel like you must conform to expected behaviour. Kids being bullied because they do not fit in or wear the right clothes makes my blood boil. I was one of them once. Keep strong and keep posting. We are here for you OK?

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thanks so much. My daughter likes what she likes and doesn’t care about labels which I love but also scares me incase the kids are mean to her. It’s good to have somewhere to feel free and I’m glad uve found that on here also. One day at a time at the moment….

      Liked by 1 person

  2. can you start out by volunteering your services with makeup? like maybe if there’s a family party coming up, you could offer to do the birthday girl’s makeup? That way you could slowly build your confidence so that it doesn’t even matter what other people think/say. If you feel confident that your makeup skills are good and you like doing it, then what others say is irrelevant. the hard part is building up the confidence though!

    Liked by 1 person

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